Merry Christmas, Happy Kwanzaa & Happy New Year!!

Thank you to everyone who has taken time to read my thoughts and experiences since this blog went live on September 2, 2013!

There are changes, updates and enhancements I'm excited to showcase and share with you all in 2014! 

I'll be wrapping up family responsibilities, exploring new formats for the blog, preparing for interviews and enjoying time with friends and family. Please feel free to review posts and follow the blog to be the first to know when there is a new story!

May your new year be filled with blessings!

See ya'll in 2014!

Peace,

Tiffany M. Williams
TiffWillWrite

End of an Era.

On September 27, I lost my job. Though rather expected it was still shocking. I instantly became a stay at home mom. I took my last walk to the bus stop with my daughter this morning. In January, it's back to full-time employment for me. Of course, I was more sad than she was. She was more excited about the fact that her Dad will be walking her and not me lol. 

In any case, I've enjoyed spending the last few months with the kids. Learning with them, teaching them, watching their eyes light up when they've mastered something they had previously struggled with, being on-call to wipe their tears and challenging them to work through their obstacles. In addition, I've started my journey as a writer with this blog. I'm confident that starting my online presence won't be diminished once I begin working again. I've found a job (really, the job found me) with an organization that believes in family time, support and community. I was missing that piece before but won't fall into the same whole twice. 

Parenting is vast and deep--not narrow and straight. Even as parents we go through seasons of change. In January we'll enter another season, new and different--but still exciting! And after that one, will come another. And so on and so on. Thanks to my husband and children for seeing me through this season...can't wait to ride this next one with them!

Vegetable and Quinoa Soup

Since me and my husband's food revelation, we're discovering more foods we love that we never heard of! This journey has lead us to the overwhelming presence of quinoa in our household. 


Quinoa (pronounced KEEN-wah) is technically a seed, but has many qualities, uses and components of a grain. Because it is comprised of all 9 essential amino acids, it is a complete protein. It is easy to digest, gluten-free and easy to prepare--basically, just like rice.

Left: Red Quinoa (sweeter); Right: White Quinoa

I've started adding quinoa to just about anything I can. The best part is our kids love it. I don't have to sneak it into anything. In fact, they ask for it! About a month ago, I made a vegetable soup. It turned out really well. I came across a recipe online that added quinoa to the soup and thought it would be perfect! I tweaked the recipe to my liking...and so can you. It's easy and tastes delicious! The best part about soup is it lasts for 2-3 days which means you can cut out a few days of cooking and spending at the grocery store.

Recipe and pics are below. Enjoy!

You need 1 cup of quinoa for every 2 cups of water. 1 cup worked fine for us. 

Cook it ahead of time according to the package. Set aside. 

Diced carrots, celery, onions and minced garlic.

(3 carrots, 2 celery, a whole onion and 2 cloves of garlic)

Sauteed in olive oil. Enough to coat the bottom well.

Oh yes, forgot I had a squash in my fridge! 

Saute all of the above veggies until they are semi-tender. I like my veggies with a bite, not mushy.

1 cup of shredded cabbage (about a half a head) 

This was my favorite ingredient. It really made the final product come to life!

The recipe called for chicken broth, but I used organic vegetable broth instead. 

Found this brand at Meijer. 32 oz.

In goes the can of diced tomatoes! (One 15 oz can) Or, you could dice up some yourself :-)

Add the vegetable broth, cabbage, tomatoes and quinoa. 

I also added a few cups of water though this is not necessary.

Season with 2 tbsp of cumin and chili powder. 

Stir, cover and let simmer for about 20 minutes to allow everything to mix and marinate well.

You may add additional seasonings to your taste. 

I also added some fresh cilantro at the end...because I love cilantro.

Now, EAT! I added some red pepper flakes to my bowl to give it some heat!

Again, the bones of the meal were taken from this recipe. I turned it into a soup instead of a chili by nixing the beans and using the vegetables of my choice. This lasted my family of 5 for 2 1/2 days (twice for dinner and a lunch) Enjoy!

The Truth is Better: Why I Tell My Daughter Santa Is Fake

"But Mommy. Santa is real."

"No honey. Santa is not real."

"Yes he is."

"No, he's not," I say, laughing.

And this conversation went on for another minute--with instigating interjections from Samuel in an effort to egg on Trinity's imagination and fascination with Santa Clause. 5 and 4 years old that want to believe. But, I just can't feed them a lie.

Growing up I never believed in Santa Clause. My parents never fed me the story about one man traveling in one night to deliver toys across the nation. Instead, our Christmas list went directly to our parents. I come from a Christian home. The story of Jesus, how his life is significant to mine, how he came to this world to die for us and how Christmas is supposed to be celebrated for his birth was amped up during this time. There was even a period of about 2-3 years where my family didn't celebrate Christmas the traditional way at all. My mother casts off the idea a pagan holiday ruling on behalf of Jesus and denounced the commercialization of what Christmas was (and still is) in American culture. 

I vividly remember one Christmas my younger brother and I waiting by my parent's bedroom door to the sound of them cutting wrapping paper. When they were done wrapping a gift, they would deliver it to one of us who would anxiously act as a runner and take it its final resting place under the Christmas tree where me and siblings would tear it to pieces the next day. Some Christmases, one sibling helped wrapped gifts for another, aiding to the excitement and secrecy of what was to come. We'd shake them, poke them and even tear off bits of paper trying to get a sneak peek.

None of the above ruined my idea of what the spirit of Christmas was about. I was never the child who crushed another kid's dream of Santa's false identity. The season of giving was not tainted for me. In fact, I would venture to say it enhanced it. Further, my parents didn't have to "unveil the truth" once they thought we were old enough to handle it. My parents working hard all year to provide us with the things we needed and wanted--should we give them the things they asked of us. What's wrong with that? Absolutely nothing.

That's why my husband and I teach our children these same values. Santa doesn't provide you with these things; you're family does. I treat Santa Clause like Dora, Mickey Mouse, Easter Bunny and Doc McStuffins--like fictional characters created for entertainment purposes only. She's taken pictures with Santa, watches Christmas movies about Santa and even talks about Santa. But it stops there. While the ideal of Santa is very real, I encourage her to remember the beauty of the season.

In a self-absorbed, narcissistic generation that is becoming more self-indulged by the milli-second, we've decided to instill in our children knowledge, understanding, hard-work, sacrifice, diligence and patience. Some might say, there's no "magic" in that. I'd like to challenge that. There's magic in teaching your children to wake up and give back to your community by feeding the homeless first before you're able to open your gifts. There's magic in showing your children that in order to get the things you want, learn to let go of the old things (i.e., the mountains of toys in your room you hardly play with). There's magic in knowing Christ's greatest mandate for us was to love God and to love people--no gifts attached. There's magic in knowing you can create memories with the ones you love that don't cost you one penny, nickle or dime. Love--pure love--is free. Love is better. This is better. The truth is better than Santa. 

12 Days of Gifts: Gifts for Women

It's day 12! I hope you all have enjoyed all of the different gifting options provided. The holidays shouldn't be but sometimes they are! I hope the gift ideas eased some of that stress for you.

Last but never least, are gifts for the ladies. The women in your life will enjoy these gifts for days, months and years to come. 

1. Birchbox Subscription. $30




Filled with cosmetics, skincare and other samples, Birchbox is great for women who want to try out certain products before they become committed to the brand. $30 gets you one month's subscription. 

2. Infinity Scarf. $19.99



Have you seen that notorious video on YouTube, 25 Ways to Wear a Scarf? Cute but...aint nobody got time for that! The infinity scarf is cute, cozy, quick and convenient. You just saved your favorite girl 4.5 minutes of time NOT spent on YouTube. She'll thank you later.

3. Fold Over Combat Boots. $37.99



Combat boots are perfect for getting through fall and winter months. They won't get soggy or wet and you can fold them up or down. A woman has GOT to have options! If she doesn't have a pair, get them for her!

12 Days of Gifts: Gifts for Guys

Whether it's your husband, boyfriend, brother or best friend, here are some gifts for the guy in your life. And all under $50!


1. Dog Ear Hat. $43.99


Yes this is a Browns hat. And yes, I'm a Browns fan (I use this term loosely). Now that that's out of the way...

Your guy can still rock his favorite team's gear while keeping warm. 

HINT: If your guy doesn't like football or basketball, you can probably find his fave NHL or MLB team for a few dollars less. 

2. Organization Station. $25


This is a perfect fit for the laptop bag or travel case. And even more perfect for my husband who loses spare chargers, headphones and other miscellaneous but important items. 

3. French Press. $31.99


This is a great gift if your guy is a coffee drinker. I wouldn't go super cheap though; you don't want to compromise the quality of the coffee. Bodum seems to be a top brand in the french press biz. This one makes up to 8 cups. 

12 Days of Gifts: Destination DIY

Would you rather make your own gifts than purchase them from a retailer? Then these gift ideas are for you!

1. Mason Jar/Manicure Set.



First spotted at Pinterest, this is a great idea to package cute trinkets in a mason jar. Once opened, the mason jar can serve as a candle holder, vase or simply as a glass to drink from. 

2. Homemade Vanilla Extract. 



After spending $6+ at Giant Eagle on 8 oz bottle of vanilla extract, I was both happy and upset to learn that making it myself was so easy! You just need two vanilla beans (bulk price for 6 starts around $6) for every 375 mL of vodka (your choice). Slit each bean in half and put them in the bottle of vodka. Its advised that you let the bottle sit for a few weeks to allow the beans to ferment properly. If you think it needs more time, attach a tag to the bottle instructing your loved one to "use after the New Year."

Hint: This is perfect for the cook in your life!

3. Personalized Mug.



I've seen this project many times over but have yet to try it. According to most blogs, you can use any inexpensive mug of your choice along with any color Sharpie markers. Next, choose your wording and or design and then bake the mug at 350 degrees. It is also been said that if you want to be sure the design is longer lasting, to use Pebeo markers. 

Don't Just Be His Wife, Be His Friend

"Sometimes, I just need you to be my friend."

Bam. There it was. 

My husband called me yesterday, energized after a long personal conversation he had with a co-worker. That conversation was an extension of one he and I had on Sunday. The Sunday conversation hadn't ended well. In fact, thinking back now, it hadn't ended at all. If that conversation were a sentence, it would end with an ellipsis, its conclusion still hanging among the clouds. 

"I need you to be my friend."

He said it again. My first and second thought was to get offended and offer a rebuttal. But instead I listened. I heard his thoughts, his concerns, his insecurities. I allowed him to go on for another few minutes before his phone dropped our call on his way home. Then, I allowed him to continue after he got home and he was able to further voice his thoughts in person. I heard what he said and even the things he did not say. Now, I was ready to hear him.

My husband married his best friend: me. And I did the same. But somewhere in between planning and preparing for the future, discussing finances, mealtime, bedtime, bath time, quick phone calls to say "I'm on the way," I forgot to be his friend. 

What I mean is subjectively hearing his thoughts. Not offer my opinion or trying to figure out the point to his monologue. Not being offended that his opinion is different than mine. Being his friend means urging him to explore his thoughts more. Giving him an indication that you're listening. You know, "hmm" or "I see" or "that's interesting." I was too judgmental in his confiding in me; too quick to assume he had all things worked out and that he was bringing them to me as a final analysis. I forgot to be the woman he called to bounce ideas of at all hours of the early morning when we were dating. I forgot to assist him in exploring and instead I shut down. I was the objective wife and not the subjective friend.

Taking friendship for granted is like forgetting you have a pillow to lay on. I am his soft place. Likewise, he is mine. Friendship brings a sense of security that invites room for forgiveness, secrets, flaws, insecurities, opinions, anger, rebuttal, triumphs and celebration. Sometimes, I believe young wives play up that role (directly or indirectly) as a qualified achievement. And while I feel it is an honor to be my husband's wife--being his friend is taken for granted. Our love sprouted from our friendship: my ability to respect the characteristics of his person and his willingness to challenge me without making me uncomfortable. Those were the open holes that allowed our love to grow. Love is an extension of friendship. You cannot have love without friendship. Further, you cannot have a healthy marriage without cultivating that friendship. 

I forgot for minute...but I'm back now. 

12 Days of Gifts: For Anyone

Universal gifts for your brother, sister, grandmother, wife, husband...you get the point! Below are gifts anyone would love!


1. Touchscreen Gloves. $30.



Another find from a new favorite, www.photojojo.com, this gift is perfect for anyone with a smartphone trying to navigate during the cold winter months.

2. Gift Cards. $Prices varies; your choice!


Ah yes, the infamous gift card. While some think its impersonal (and it probably is if you get this gift for everyone), but you still need to add a personal touch. Don't gift a gift card from your favorite store, try their favorite store! Or, think about someone's interests and hobbies and introduce them to a new retailer. Gas cards also make a great gift.

3. Phone Case/Wallet. $24.99


Am I the only woman who hates carrying a purse? A purse weighs me down, especially when I have lots of errands to run or if I know I'll be collecting additional bags along the way (i.e., shopping). I like to carry my phone, money and debit card only. This allows me to do just that! It's handy for guys too because it fits in pockets just like a wallet would. I love gifts that are trendy and functional. This design is so perfect I wish I thought of it first!

12 Days of Gifts: For the Kids

Thinking of something different and creative for the kids in your life this year? Check out the below gifts that are sure to expand their minds and stretch their thinking.

1. Color My World Globe. $28.50



I've been eyeing this gift for my house in order to take our kids knowledge of the world to the next level! Erasable markers and animal stickers are sure fire ways to make this gift fun and educational. 

2. Rainbow Loom Kit. $13+


Rainbow Loom bracelets are becoming more and more popular with kids. They remind me of gimp bracelets I loved making as a little girl. Creative, no-TV-required fun, kids can make these for family and as gifts for birthdays or other celebrations.

3. Hashtag Necklace. $43



This gift is certainly a sign of the times! It's cute and trendy. Instead of their name, you can personalize it with a word or a phrase. Have fun with this one!


***SPLURGE ALERT***

I am a firm believer that one of the best things we can do for our children is teach them how to make a better future for themselves. Above all the gifts listed above, this would be the #1 thing I would suggest to get for your children for a holiday gift.

Shares of Stock. $Price varies.



How cool would it be for your social-media obsessed teenager to receive a share of Facebook stock? Or your six year old to get a stock in Disney or Dreamworks.  And if they don't think it's cool now, in 1, 2 or 10 years, they will!

12 Days of Gifts: For the Fashion Forward

Day 7 is coming a few days late! Forgive me? Thank you! The good news is the gifts are still in time for the holiday season.

Super trendy and inexpensive are two positives for the person in your life who likes to look good without the splurge!

1. Purse phone case. $15



This is a sleek and stylish phone case for iPhone 5 users. Built like a cute and compact clutch purse, this gift will be a hit for your fashion-forward friend or family member!

2. Women's Faux Leather Dress. $29.99




Whats a fashion-forward and budget-friendly blog with a piece from Target?? The faux leather trend is one of my favorites! Hurry to Target.com...this dress is currently on sale for $17.99!


3. Leather Tie Case. $17.68



I couldn't forget about the fellas! I first saw this much more expensive version of the above at Pierrepont Hicks. Their version is almost $200. This one by JoS A. Bank is a steal, trendy and (as most men like) practical.

12 Days of Gifts: The Cook

Due to my new food revelation, I'm in the kitchen more. The below gifts are perfect for the seasoned cook and the novice alike. Bon Appetit! 

1. Belkin Kitchen Stand. $27.99



Ever find the perfect recipe from browsing on your Kindle or iPad then cringe at all of the food stains left on the screen from scrolling back and forth? What I love about this stand is it comes with a stylus to eliminate that frustration! Additional features include a non-slip rubber base and the ability to view the tablet in two different angles.

2. Sushi Quik. $34.95



Some people won't need the above item, just a bamboo mat and they're good. But for a sushi-making novice (like myself), the Sushi Quik kit is a good starting point for a sushi lover who doesn't want to spend on eating out. The reviews of this product are consistently favorable with ease of use and good end results. Check it out!

3. Cutting Board Index Set. $39.99



I always cringe at the sight of my cutting board when its messy from all of the different types of meats, vegetables, fruits, etc. being chopped up. The cutting board set is great for food safety and eliminating any fears to cross contamination.

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Later today: Gifts for the Fashion-forward

12 Days re-cap

Day 1 - Gifts for the Photo-Crazy Friend
Day 2 - Gifts for the Music Lover 
Day 3 - Gifts for the Busy Bee
Day 4 - Gifts for the Writer
Day 5 - Gifts for the Culturally Conscious 

My Food Revelation: Why Jay-Z Is On To Something...

Late last night, I read various headlines on Google that boasted of Jay-Z announcing on his website that he and Beyonce have embarked on a 22-day challenge to become vegans. Feeling spiritually inspired by the upcoming date of his 44th birthday, Jay-Z stated on his website that "it just feels right!"

"Why now? There’s something spiritual to me about it being my 44th birthday and the serendipity behind the number of days in     this challenge; 22 (2+2=4) coupled with the fact that the challenge ends on Christmas day…It just feels right!" - Jay-Z

Now, I'm no fanatic of Jay-Z or Beyonce. I don't have all their albums and don't subscribe as a member of the "Beyhive." However, I am a product of being born in 1983. Meaning I was raised in the 90's. I remember summers spent listening to Beyonce and crew (Destiny's Child) belt out notes from their infamous sophomore album, The Writings on the Wall. And I remember the gym going crazy when my high school drill team danced to Jay-Z's rendition of Hard Knock Life. So, I know their effect on pop culture.
                                         
                                             

                                           


Jay-Z's newly found food revelation as an extension of his spiritual and physical well-being sounds much like my process for the last two weeks. While writing this blog, I'm watching Food Matters. A 2008 documentary, it emphasizes the relationship between nutrition for attaining and maintaining good health as opposed to medicinal and prescription options. Prior to today I also watched Forks Over Knives, another documentary that promotes (and has evidence to back it up) a whole foods, plant-based diet as a means for curing many diseases such as heart disease and diabetes. I watched it two weeks ago and my mind was blown! The injection of GMOs, preservatives and other processed elements are widely contributing to higher rates of obesity in our children and a poor quality of life. Simply put, food is better for us when presented in its natural state---simply food. 

Presently, me and my husband have eliminated processed foods in our home by roughly 80 percent. Is it more expensive? Is it a strain on our finances? Yes and yes! But sometimes you have to pay more to get more. And I'm no Jay-Z and Beyonce in terms of money...but I'm doing it! Once, I had my mind made up, there was not turning back! I'm a firm believer that my job as a parent is to provide my children with the best resources, knowledge, tools and information for them to make the best decisions when I am long gone from this Earth. And the best way to do it is to model it. Show and prove!

So, while I wasn't a huge fan of Magna Carta Holy Grail and didn't buy a Samsung Galaxy because the album would be free if I downloaded it; and I wasn't a big fan of his partnership with Barney's department. But, Jay-Z might be onto something here. He and Beyonce's influence in pop cultural crosses race, gender, age and socio-economic status. Together they have the power to move crowds and I like their choice to move people to think about their eating choices. For now, I'm eliminating processed foods more and more everyday and deciding what I'm going to do long-term. 

And I'll be watching Jay and Bey for the next 22 days ;-)

12 Days of Gifts: For the Culturally-Connected

These gifts are certain to provide more education and resolve for the culturally aware, capable and conscious in your life!

The African-Americans: Many Rivers to Cross Book. $34.95




If you missed this PBS special that recently aired this past October and November, you can gift the book version of the TV special. Brought to us by the brilliant Henry Louis Gates, Jr., the book chronicles the struggles of Africans and African-Americans from 1500 to the present. 

2. Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee. $13



The above is a non-fiction account of a member of the indigenous people who were here long before Columbus any other European explorer. Heavily regarded as impactful and emotional, the culturally aware and inept in your life may need to be ready to re-learn history as presented to them in school.

3. Made by Survivors jewelry. Starting at $10.



Made by Survivors is a not-for-profit, social service that employs survivors of human trafficking; most of which are women and children. All items purchased are used in order to have those affected attain and maintain secure and safe employment. Made by Survivors also trains and provides educational resources for participants of their programs. 

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Tomorrow: Gifts for the Cook

12 Days re-cap

Day 1 - Gifts for the Photo-Crazy Friend
Day 2 - Gifts for the Music Lover 
Day 3 - Gifts for the Busy Bee
Day 4 - Gifts for the Writer

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Small Business Saturday: Time Spent Empowering Our Girls

The Saturday after Thanksgiving is widely becoming known as Small Business Saturday. On this day, consumers are highly encouraged to support locally owned stores for their products and/or services. I spent my Saturday doing just that!

I had the honor of participating as an Eryn PiNK role model for Eryn PiNK, Ltd. Eryn PiNK, a for-profit organization, was created to provide positive role models to our young ladies. Founded by my friend Eryn Nicole, the organization believes in fostering confidence, positive self-branding and healthy lifestyles. Eryn PiNK offers workshops and other services to facilitate these ideas in the future women of America. 

     

                     Founder of Eryn PiNK, Eryn Nicole

Each girl introduced themselves by saying their name, age, school attended and two things they like about themselves. It was refreshing and enlightening to hear girls talk about their long legs, hair, eyes, style and personality as a point of pride. One girl even said her favorite thing about herself was her "awkwardness!" Go girl!

Saturday's workshop with 15 girls (ages 11-16) was led by Eryn Nicole and focused on branding yourself. Girls were taught the basics of advertising/marketing, what a brand is and how it is connected to a logo. Further, those concepts were tied to how you feel about a certain brand or the value you get from being attached to it. All of these concepts were related back to each girls' personal brand, what they value individually and how everyone is their on brand!

After the break, it was time for the Eryn PiNK Bow Factory! The girls made their own hair bows...because every girl needs one! Attached to it, each girl wrote their own personal message about what they learned about the workshop and what they wanted to share with another girl down the line.

Photo from: Eryn PiNK Ltd. Facebook page

Photo from: Eryn PiNK Ltd. Facebook page

Aside from being with my family or friends, this is the best way to spend my day---giving back and imparting values to our young girls. It's a passion of mine and I was honored to spend it alongside Eryn PiNK! For more information on the services, please contact Eryn PiNK via their website, by email (erynpink@gmail.com) or by calling 614.285.PINK.